Episode Lines

Gil: [appearing suddenly] D'ah, she's a beut'. You can't beat a Coleco, eh ...? How many can I put ya' down for, a lot? Please say "a lot," I need this.

Skinner: I dunno. I'm not even sure we can keep this one. It's up to Lisa.

Chalmers: Whaddayasay, Lisa? Will you keep our little secret for the good of your classmates and your school?

Gil: And let's not forget ol' Gil, huh? The wolf's at old Gil's door. [Lisa looks around at Skinner and Chalmers who look back anxiously, and at Ralph, who is happily picking his nose] 

Lisa: Oooh ... I guess I don't have much choice. 

Gil: Aw, thank God! Now, let's talk rust-proofing. These Colecos'll rust up on ya' like =that=, er ... shut up, Gil. Close the deal ... close the deal!


Gil: Come on, baby, show Gil a four! [rolls dice -- snake eyes]

Dealer: Craps!

Gil: Oh, no, why did I bet the company payroll? Oh, Gil's in a lot of trouble.


Smitten with the Canyonero bug, Homer visits his friendly dealer, % where he literally drools over the new trucks. Gil approaches him.

Gil: Go ahead, drool all you want, you can't hurt that finish. Now rainwater, that will strip it right off, so ... aw, I shouldn't have said that ... aw, Gil.

Homer: Hey, a red one. [runs to a red Canyonero] Can I buy that? Please?

Gil: Well, if you, well ... really? Wow, Hot, hot dog! A sale! [goes to put a little Canyonero marker, indicating a sale, on a bulletin board]

Stan: I'll take it from here, Gil. [takes Gil's marker]

Gil: No, wait, no. Aw, you can't take my sale. My wife's going to leave me if I don't start bringing in the green. Come on, let me have this one, Stan, I'm begging you. Look at me, I'm begging you, Stan.

Stan: Mm-hm. [walks Homer to his office] Let's go write this up, shall we?

Gil: [pulls a rotary-dial cell phone from his jacket, and dials] Honey, you should have seen me with my last customer, I ... no, but I came so close. This guy was as ... Whose voice is that? Is that Fred? ... Aw, you said it was over ... No, don't put him on -- Hello, Fred, h-hi.